Crom: The Cocaine Wars, 1974-1989

The Cocaine Wars, 1974, 1989: click this link to see the full cover art; it's possibly the greatest album cover ever made. Reviews below taken from that page.

This is not music. It's an historical essay on the cultural evolution
of metal from the 70's to the end of the 80's. One 30+ minute collage
of music and words that basically recaps the history of the heavy
during the cocaine years on earth. I think that you would have to be a
rather refined fan of the genre in order to fully appreciate this work
of incomparable genius. If you have a functioning brain, have not
irreparably damaged your mnemonic faculties, possess a sense of humor,
and like everything from Slayer to Steely Dan, then you may well be
amused and even amazed by what you hear here.


I'VE ALWAYS SAID THAT COCAINE WARS IS THE PAUL´S BOUTIQUE OF METAL!!!
(Stacey - Green Eggs and Jam)


Black-death-speed metal in arctic barbarian packaging. On the cover is a
half-nakedwarrior chick riding a polar bear and inside are renderings of
our Vikingesque heroes and there's another nice sketch of one of them
snorting lines of white powder off of an ancient dagger. All this and more
helps to make for some of the funnest schtick-metal you ever heard before
you even get it in the player.  Holy Robert E. Howard! . . .  the songs
(30 of them in 36 minutes) aren't bad either! A lot of "where have I heard
that riff before?" silliness and then total Slayer meets Spinal Tap at an
SCA convention, punctuated by humorous bits of sampling and programming
(even including a bit of Kraftwerk's Trans Europe Express!).  Haw, haw,
haw!  This is the most brilliant piece of tounge-in-cheek metal I've heard
since Godheadsilo's "Share the Fantasy" and Crom goes a hell of a lot
further with the whole thing than they did (emphasis on the "hell").
Shee-at.  I'll keep this one.  Cut the sleeves off your shirt and go rent
River's Edge. Crom Rulz!


"Is this a joke?" - Glenn Danzig (when he was shown the Crom album)

1. Riders of Doom

2. Humiliate the Corpse

3. Crom's Beard

4. Farewell Bambata

5. Valeria

6. Timenough

7. Keep Running Dog Boy

8. Celebrate the Flesh

9. Discipline of Steel

10. Wheel of Pain

11. Steel Reserve

12. Black Lotus

13. Thunder Dust

14. Twomb

15. Throne of Blood

16. Funeral Pyre

17. Concubine

18. The Foot of Cole Ford

19. The Usurper

20. Hidden Fortress

21. The Jeweled Crown of Aqua Lonia

22. The Cauldron

23. Sweet Tigris